When Positivity Meets Rejection: The Psychology Behind One of My Toughest Sales Moments

There are days in business when you walk into a conversation fully lit up — motivated, honest, and ready to serve. You believe you’re about to close a huge deal. You’re pumped. You’re smiling. You feel aligned with your purpose.

And then… you get blindsided.

This blog is about one of those days — a moment where I learned that even the most genuine energy can get slapped down by misunderstanding and miscommunication. This story isn’t just about me. It’s about you too — every business owner, every hustler who has ever been hit with rejection when they least expected it.

The Setup

I had a lead — a huge customer with multiple stores in Wisconsin and even more across other states. I built a relationship with two key people: a high-up manager and a partial owner. We clicked instantly. When I speak with people, they often feel like they’ve known me forever. It’s what I’m good at — genuine connection.

I explained my setup honestly: I work with a bigger distributor, and they’ve told me I can handle certain customers in Wisconsin if it makes things easier. I also told them I can supply other products directly, with no connection to that distributor, to keep things separate and clear.

These two guys were fully on board. They got it.

The Collapse

Then came the big decision-maker — the top dog. He wasn’t in the loop the same way. Somehow, the conversation he had with the big distributor spun the story differently. He was told I wasn’t an official rep. Which was true. But the way it was framed… made it sound like I was misleading them.

So I walk into the store, fired up, motivated, genuinely excited to help this business grow. And this guy hits me with: "You lied to me."

I was stunned. This wasn’t a cold lead — this was warm. This was aligned. Yet somehow, I was being treated like a scammer. I tried to explain. I apologized for the misunderstanding. But he was shut off completely. "I don’t do business this way. I’d appreciate it if you left."

What Just Happened?

This is more than just a lost deal. It’s what I call an expectational reversal. And the psychology behind it is deep.

1. Emotional Dissonance

I came in positive. He came in suspicious. When your emotional state doesn’t match the other person’s, it creates a powerful disconnect. You can be saying all the right things, but it won’t matter if their mind is made up.

2. Confirmation Bias

He already believed I was misleading him. So everything I said only confirmed that belief. Facts couldn’t change that. He wasn't listening for truth — he was listening for validation of his distrust.

3. Rejection Trauma

When your identity is built around helping people — and someone treats you like the opposite — it hits hard. It challenges your sense of purpose. But this is also where growth happens.

What Would Tony Robbins Say?

“Your state determines your story. Your story determines your strategy.”

Tony would say the problem wasn’t what happened — it was the meaning I gave it. If I attach the meaning “I failed”, I weaken. But if I attach the meaning “This taught me how to future-proof my messaging and clarify my intentions better”, I strengthen.

He’d also remind me to stay in a resourceful state — even in rejection. “The quality of your life is the quality of your emotions.”

What Would the Stoics Say?

Marcus Aurelius: “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”

Epictetus: “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”

To the Stoics, this was simply an exercise in maintaining composure, controlling my response, and using it as a tool for inner strength. It was never about the customer. It was always about the discipline of the mind.

So What’s the Hustler Move?

This moment isn’t a loss. It’s part of my Top 500 Business Moves. It’s the story I’ll tell the next time someone gets rejected, misunderstood, or shut down despite good intentions.

Because being a real Hustler isn’t about everything going your way. It’s about who you become when it doesn’t.

And if you’re reading this?

Stay honest. Stay grounded. Learn from every emotional clash. Because every “no” is sharpening your blade for the next “yes.”

– Hustlerman.com